Day 26

Will you take the first step home?

It’s amazing to me how hitting rock bottom almost always brings about the kind of wisdom one needs before the journey to the bottom began.

When it was more than I could handle I called Mom. I was exhausted. I had used up all my extra emotional energy. All I could smell was manure and something like the bottom of a trash can. You know the one. The one where we take all the trash from the house. And sometime within the last month one of the bags must have been breached. The smell is excruciating! With each trip out with the day’s trash you hold your breath, open fast, throw and then run other direction. So, I’m not sure if it’s humility or just common sense that helps us take the first step home.

Mom had confronted me and loved me and continued to care for me while I was running. And when I could not hold my breath any longer I called home. After confessing I was immediately breathing new air -the kind I wanted to breath all along. This air is different. You walk into it and you want to stay. You breath long and deep.

I love the song, “This is the air I breath, Your holy presence, living in me. And I, I’m desperate for You. And I, I’m lost without You.”

God, help us to smell the air around us. And if it’s foul, if it’s not Your smell, I pray you would give us wisdom, humility and courage to take the first step toward home. In Jesus name, amen.


Nathan Tillotson